I want to talk about my genitals. Specifically, I want to talk about my butt. Personally, my anus is as important to my sexual pleasure and satisfaction, indeed to my identity as a man who has sex with other men, as my dick is. My buttocks and perineum (the sensitive skin between my butthole and ball-sack), and most definitely my arsehole and prostate, I consider to be part of my genitals. Just like my dick, sack, and balls, my anal genitals are unplugged power-tools I use to create ecstatic orgasms. A stupendous range of sensations can be stimulated across the whole anorectal genital area without ever touching the cock and balls. This is one of countless reasons that I enthusiastically talk and write about anal health and pleasure with friends, lovers, and clients.
Thinking about my anal health is a pleasure
I keep my dick clean and healthy so I can get as much pleasure from it as it can give. I keep my ass clean and healthy for those same reasons. Still, guys seem to find it hard to open up about loving their buttholes despite the pleasures enjoyed from anal play. When I talk with someone about anal hygiene and health, it is often simplest to compare the care I take with my dental hygiene and oral health, to the care I take to ensure my arsehole and rectum is in the best condition possible to receive the sexy attentions of a lover.
If I want my arse kissed, it should be as kissable as my mouth
I brush my teeth; I floss (though not as often as I want to); I enjoy a good gargle and spit with mouthwash to keep me confident that my kisser is kissable. When I get a sore throat I remedy it and when a tooth betrays me, I seek medical help. Now, since I am #BraveEnough to get a bad tooth extracted from my scull, I am brave enough to have a clinic nurse check out a haemorrhoid, fissure, or any other anal malady that is keeping me from having awesome buttsex.
Genital Health – Hole to Pole
My sexual equipment only delivers ecstatic orgasms if my genitals – hole to pole – are cared for and healthy. For a lover to approach an arse with genuine enthusiasm, it must be clean and healthy. Some individuals love their arseholes enough to budget for hygiene-wipes rather than tissue paper. It is important to use a fragrance free wipe that is hypoallergenic. Others forgo wiping their bums, preferring the clean feel of a water wash after they have gone to empty their bowels. Taking the time to explore the range of anal hygiene habits you could adopt can have significant personal comfort and health benefits. Anal sex is a high-risk sexual pleasure, but it becomes more risky if the equipment is not maintained in tiptop condition.
Anal maladies are very common. For example, there is nothing to fear when you pop out a haemorrhoid. Although this can be caused by the pleasurable abandon of rough sex, not enough lubrication, or insufficient foreplay to relax the anal sphincter, a haemorrhoid is more often than not the result of constipation, or a bout of diarrhoea. Similarly, a small anal fissure (skin tear) after a prolonged or rough sex session is to be expected. Such a skin tear looks much like a paper cut, and may be hard to detect with the naked eye, but it is felt every bit as much as a scraped knee or knuckle. Generally, these conditions will self-heal within a couple of weeks with care taken to keep the anorectal area clean with a lukewarm water wash after defecating.
However, some haemorrhoids and anal fissures become chronic and deep, and will not heal. Some STI’s like HPV, chlamydia, herpes, and syphilis can undermine the integrity of our genital tissues, creating chronic problems for our butts from common problems like haemorrhoids and small anal fissures.
The greatest obstacle in our way to practicing good anorectal hygiene and experiencing marvellous anal pleasures is the taboo around butt talk. This sociocultural anal taboo keeps us from talking about anal health and pleasure and the silence is unhealthy.
Talking About Anal Sexuality Uplifts Human Sexuality
Anal health knowledgeability and anal exploration are important aspects of responsible health behaviour. Nevertheless, our societies and cultures avoid everyday talk of anal sexuality and health. You and I need to be #BraveEnough to bust this taboo. It is in our best interest, and in the interest of our best orgasms, to talk about our butts as much as possible with as many people as possible. If you can exclaim to your friends about that last visit to the dentist, why not share about your bum-troubles? Bust the taboo and let us talk anal health and pleasure.
In posts to come, I will discuss many topics following the theme of anal health and pleasure, and share brave men’s experiences with their own butts, and the butts they love to make love to.
Witten by Jacsman
Jacsman is a research psychologist, consultant and mentor who wants to ensure men who have sex with men and LGBTQ communities keep their hearts, minds, bodies, and desires healthy and sustainably developing. He writes and talks to promote wholistic authenticity that furthers understanding of masculinities and femininities, sustainable sexuality, and Queer and MSM relationships.